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Why I Said No to “Dating” For a Year

[TRANSPARENT POST]: I remember last Valentine’s Day like it was yesterday. As usual…I was working. I’m usually cheffing on major holidays so that’s never anything new. BUT…I thought I had like a lil‘ baby Valentine. Or at least someone that I was getting to know and was going on dates with. I admit- I was kind of excited about the possibility of having one. And then I didn’t hear from him that whole week. I even reached out. Nothing. With the hustle and bustle of the day, I busied myself with clients and work. But midnight on Feb 14  came…and I still had not heard from him. And then I got a little sad. And mad. Cried. alldat. I just couldn’t figure out why I wasn’t finding my Mr. Wonderful like everyone else. So I decided to do something different….

Whiichhh brings me to this post…”Why I Said No to Dating for a Year.” I definitely don’t want you thinking that something is odd about that or feel bad about singleness. (Because I certainly don’t!) Singleness is not a disease! I repeat-singleness is not a disease! After last Valentine’s Day and a couple of terrible dates in between, I vowed to stop traditionally “dating.” I’ve taken this year to get to just get to know myself and spend time with me. I took myself on dates. I pampered myself. I traveled. I finally found my sense of style. I bought quality makeup and feminine thangs. I cut my hair. It’s been AMAZING. 

Sooooo if you’re single…and just over this awkward and kind of miserable stage of “dating”, I encourage you to have a Private Party. [India Arie’s song “Private Party” is one of my favorite songs…so I always call that phase in my life my Private Party.] I think you’ll definitely experience everything that I did-freedom, liberation, solace, and just a good time loving on YOU. Take a month, a few months, a year-to do what you gotta do. Noone can love you like you can. 

Even though last Valentine’s Day sucked, I’m so appreciative that it happened the way that it did. I learned so much about myself.  Oh and that guy? He texted me the day after Valentine’s Day…and has even come across in my messages a couple of times. Sorry dear…it’s a no for me lol. 

Sooo stay encouraged girl! Take yaself out. Have a #treatyoself day…or weekend. Go to brunch. Get your nails and hair done. Go see a movie by yourself. Eat everything yummy that you want. And know that soon-your Mr. Wonderful is coming. And he’s going to be worth the wait. =)

Peace, love, and Food, 



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    February 17, 2017
  • reply

    Ive decided to do the same and stop dating. I had met a guy and we went out and talked several times during the weeks. It seemed like things were starting to flourish but this week On Tuesday, he sends me a text saying Happy Valentine’s Day. I felt insulted and kinda hurt. I didn’t even respond. I deleted the text.

    February 17, 2017
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    Love this & keep it up. I love waking up to check my emails like I always do & see a new post 🚨 from Chef Elle! Love yah doll😘

    February 17, 2017

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